It Was Time
by Belle of Books
Summary: It was time. Tony's breaking point.
1. Chapter 1

Over and over again. Insult after insult. Day into night. Year after year. Same thing. Same pattern. He sat, his thoughts slowly passing through his brain. He turned his head to the side after staring at his computer screen blankly for a quarter of an hour. He checked the time. Two thirty. In the morning. He stood, stretching his tired muscles and walked to the window and stared over Washington. Same pattern. He hadn't gone home in days. He slept at his desk and worked on cold cases to pass the nights. He had nothing at home to which to go. No family, no pet. Only his movies, and not even they gave him much pleasure.

No one respected him. He didn't know what had happened. He thought by this time he would have earned their trust. He'd gone and saved _her_ from the depths of Africa. He'd watched _his_ six for years, saved him from drowning, and cared for his team. He's flirted with and comforted _her_. He'd prodded _him_ into the man he now was. No one cared.

Perhaps he deserved some of it. He acted like a goof-off. He wasn't. Not really. But they didn't care. Not really. He did his job and did it well. Could have left. Many times. Never did. As he stared out the window into the dark he asked himself why. He asked himself if he would have been happier in Rota. Wouldn't have been there when Jenny died, wouldn't have had to deal with the whole Jeanne fiasco. . . But. . . on the other hand, he now knew what he hadn't then. He was ready. He was ready to be a leader, to be serious, to mix it with making people comfortable. He was a darn good interrogator. He'd saved hostages. He's been shot at, captured, drugged, poisoned, infected, watched his partner die, gone on a suicide mission. . .and no one remembered.

He remained the frat-boy Tony. He was sick of that Tony. He wanted a home. This used to be a home. A dysfunctional family. It wasn't even that any more. Any progress he had made in this family was gone. Gibbs cared only about the job. McGee didn't need him anymore and didn't want him as a friend either. Ziva cared only about her new Miami man and poking painful fun at Tony's benefit. Abby was Abby. Palmer had his girlfriend. Ducky didn't need Tony, never really had. Vance didn't respect him.

Maybe it was time. Finally. To leave. He had options. Ask for a transfer, move to the FBI. Tony leaned his forehead against the cool panes of the glass and sighed. It was time, he was sure. He'd done his job and a darn good job. He was sick of being poked and prodded and no thank you's and no one remembering what he had done. He didn't want a production contrary to what people generally thought about Tony. He just wanted someone to realize that he wasn't there simply because he smiled. He was a good agent, a good detective. He looked up and nodded. Turning around, he packed his bag and turning out his light, headed for the elevator, going home for the first time in days.

His apartment. None of his coworkers had really ever spent much time there. He gave a small smile as he set his jacket down. The irony. They thought they knew him. If they thought there was more they hadn't taken the time to figure out what else was there. They'd each seen snippets of serious Tony. Didn't matter much to them though. Bare, sparse, clean. Brown, sleek furniture on wooden floors. Basic, impersonal. The only personal hints in the room a picture of Abby, a certain picture of Ziva, a grand piano and a wall of movies. Tony shrugged out of his shirt and headed for his room, falling on his bed. He stared at the ceiling, one hand on his chest. Closing his eyes, he fell asleep.

He woke a few short hours later to the shilling of his cell informing him of a case. He rolled off and placed of his head in his hands before pushing himself up and rising in the shower for a minute. He went to his closet and put on one of his best suits. He needed the protection, the added knowledge of his own immaculate appearance. Staring at himself for a minute before heading out the door, he knew what he was doing that day.

It was a reasonably predicable case. Abby had found enough forensic evidence and Gibbs was able to wring a confession out of a terrified girlfriend with minor effort. Sitting at his desk, his report almost done, Tony looked up the stairs towards the director's office. Pushing himself up, Tony headed up the stairs. The secretary let him in and Tony walked to Vance.

Looking at him, Vance tilted his head. "Agent DiNozzo. This is a surprise."

Tony looked at him directly. "Yes, sir. I have a request."

Vance squinted his eyes and pulled out a toothpick. "Continue."

Tony leaned forward in his chair, "I want to request a transfer."

Vance looked surprised. "Out of all the things you might have said, DiNozzo, I wasn't expecting this. You were the one who threw a fit when I sent you as Agent Afloat."

"I know," Tony responded. "I didn't think I was ready. I felt responsible for Je. . .the Director and being sent away wasn't something I was ready for. But. . .now? Now, I'm stuck. I know you'd love nothing more than to get rid of me and don't respect me, but I'm a darn good agent. I do my job and more, even if you don't think so. Even if you don't think so, I've done my fair share to make sure this team works. Now, I'm sick of it. Sick of being teased and not thanked, of working myself to death and no one noticing. I'm sick of trying to improve myself and no one caring or believing it. I'm not the same man I was three years ago. Not even close. I've watched Gibbs' six, but now, I'm not sure if anyone's watching mine."

Vance leaned back and looked at Tony. "I know you think I don't like you and frankly, you're right. I don't really like you, but I've reread your file. You're a damn good agent and I almost wish you weren't because you're the exception to the type of agent I believe works. I don't know what to do with you. Frankly, Gibbs needs a wake up call that his methods are the only ones and he's not a freakin' god. I don't know if I can trust you to respect me and I don't really want two Gibbs on my hands."

"I can't promise," Tony started, "to not do some of the things Gibbs has taught me. But I can do this and I'm different from him. I don't promise that I'm not gonna question some of the things that you'll tell me. But I'll respect you. As long as I get shown some sort of respect."

"I've gotten a job opening. I've been waiting and thinking about who to should get it. I'm gonna give it to you, DiNozzo," Vance looked steadily at Tony. "I don't like you much, but I'll give you this chance. Don't screw it up. I want reports and I want check-ins and I don't want you running around."

Tony leaned forward again and gave a brief nod. "Sounds like a deal."

Vance gave a small, amused smile. "Don't even care where it is, DiNozzo?"

Tony looked up and gave an amused sigh. "Don't care at the this point, Director."

"The Pentagon. It's an honor DiNozzo. I could ship you off to the Great Lakes."

Tony looked at Vance and nodded. "Thank you," he said as he stood and shook Vance's hand.

"We'll tell your team together. Then pack your stuff and be gone." Vance commanded.

Tony made his way out of the room. Finally, he had an opportunity. He was going to do this. It didn't matter what the others said at this point. What they pleaded, if they pleaded at all. The chances were that they wouldn't even care. He was only good for them to insult and relieve their frustrations toward. Tony headed down the stairs to his desk, ignoring the insults of his coworkers about his visit to the "principal." He finished his report and ignored any commands made by Gibbs or the inevitable head slap accompanying them. It was over. This was the end. It was the end to his time. Finally. It was bittersweet. He had spent more time there than anywhere in the past. But he had reached his breaking point. And he had been given a second chance to redeem himself. To make something of himself. And he would. He would be a success. He would be a firm leader, a fun leader. He wouldn't become Gibbs. And he wouldn't be his old self. He would be Tony DiNozzo. It didn't matter anymore. Whatever anyone said, he was done. And he was okay with that.

_I hoped everyone liked it. I don't really like writing messages accompanying the stories but I felt this deserved a line. I've felt frustrated with the way everyone's been treating Tony and I'm really interested to know what they're going to do with his character at the end of the season. Again, I hoped people liked it. _


	2. Chapter 2 It Was Right

Walked around the banister. Leaned on the railing. He looked down into the bullpen. Business. Same business. Same people. He watched McGee typing away at his computer doing something he didn't quite understand. Didn't terribly care either. He had come into his own. Now it was time for McGee to do his job, without DiNozzo on the front lines. Ziva. She was texting, probably her Miami secret man. He'd tried. Under a mask of semi-interested humor, he'd tried to make sure this Ray was better than the rest she'd chosen. To late now. She's probably be glad. It'd mean no more interference in her private life. Gibbs. Never quite sure what he was doing. Tony pushed back against his arms and rolled his neck around. How to tell them. How to tell them that he was done. They didn't need him and frankly he didn't feel like they even wanted him. Gibbs would protest, meaning well. Ziva would say next to nothing, remaining ever stoic. McGee would be confused but except the decision Tony made. Abby would be heartbroken though. Abby. Almost wished he didn't have to leave her. Ducky, he had been a good friend. If anyone would understand his decision, Ducky would try. How to tell them. Almost wished he could just leave. No worry. No fuss. No explanation. But that's what Gibbs had done. He was going to be better than that.

But he wasn't leaving the city. That was a small relief. He would stay in the city. Stay in his apartment. Keep his other friends. His apartment. He didn't hate his team. Not really. He had been hurt one too many times that was all. That's the way the world works. Phases come and end. This one was over.

Down the stairs. The same stairs he had traversed time and time again. Angry? Not really… Hurt? A bit… Strangely satisfied? Yes.

He wouldn't forget the past years. Couldn't. Even if he wanted to. These years had made him who he was. Gibbs's rules. His undercover missions. Teaching the Probie.

Now he would like by his own rules. He wouldn't leave his team behind. He'd teach them teamwork. He'd teach them everything he's learned.

Leaning on the partition around the bullpen, Tony looked. Probie typing on his computer. Ziva twirling a pen, now looking at paperwork, her phone resting close beside. Gibbs doing something at his desk, something of some importance. Tony moved in to the bullpen. He sat at his desk. Looked at his paperwork.

Sure? Think so... Yes. Sure. It's over… stayed long enough. Not his fault. Didn't do anything wrong. Could've done differently. Maybe. But not wrong. McGee was a good man. Full of pride though. Have to get over that soon. Can't be team leader and be full of pride. It's a team effort, Tim. Should have told you that more. Just because Gibbs seems like he's invincible doesn't mean we all are. He's not either. You've seen that. I've seen that too. Didn't realize it… or ignored it. New start. A new chance. Now the hardest part. Saying goodbye. Trying to explain why not going to stay.

Tony leaned back and stared at the ceiling. He leaned forward and called Ducky. Asked him to come up and bring Palmer. Good friend that one. He dialed Abby and asked her up. Looking up from his phone, Tony caught the confused stares of his team. Just a minute. They'd all know in a minute. He heard the elevator door ring and heard the distant voices of Ducky and Abby involved in an animated recitation some event. He reached down to the phone again and dialed Vance. It was time.

Abby bounced to Gibbs.

"Gibbs, Gibbs, Gibbs! What's going on? I swear I did nothing except two weeks ago I did let the humane society borrow..."

"Abs! Not my problem if I don't know. Talk to DiNozzo. I don't know why you're here."

As Abby bounced over, a thousand questions coming from her mouth, Tony looked up the stairs at Vance. Vance looked, one last time, one last question in his eyes. Tony gave a nod, a single nod with steady eyes. Vance gave a half shrug and gave a half smile. Tony looked and met Gibbs's confused blue eyes. Gibbs looked suspiciously at Tony, Tony tilted his head and slowly stood up from his desk, Vance coming around to stand near him.

"Gibbs, everyone," Vance pulled the toothpick out of his mouth. "DiNozzo and I have some news."

"He's not going undercover again! He can't! I won't let him!" Abby burst in.

"Miss Scuito. Tony is not going undercover. DiNozzo and I made the decision that he has outlasted his time here at headquarters. I am transferring him to the Pentagon to work with anti-terrorism and drug and arms trafficking special cases. Fully with his agreement and per his request, Gibbs," cutting off the imminent protest.

A stunned silence. The other team members looked at each other with confused, bewildered glances. Tony leaving? Why? Why now?

Tony looked around him. Looked at Vance and gave a nod of appreciation.

Gibbs walked up to Tony and looked at him.

"DiNozzo!" He barked. "I didn't give you permission to leave my team! Why? You're ripping apart my team!" He pointed at Abby with her slowly tear filling eyes. "That's because of you DiNozzo!"

Tony looked into Gibbs's eyes steadily and evenly. "I don't need your permission. Vance has everything worked out. It's time for me to leave. It's time for Tim to step up. He'll do it. Well. He did it well four years ago when he worked for me. He can do it again for you. Abby," Tony turned. "Abby. I love you, you know. I can't stay here anymore. You know I can't."

Abby gave a small nod and launched herself into Tony's arms.

"DiNozzo! Why, I asked."

"Because, because I need to feel my talents can be used in a better place than here. I need to feel needed and I need to feel appreciated. Not happening here. They've grown up, Gibbs. I've trained them as much as I can. I've learned all I can from you. Did several years ago really. I can't stay here. Same place, same job, same needlessness. Not anymore. Got a new job. I can apply everything I've learned. Ziva, Ziva… She's done with me. Too tense anymore. She can't take me seriously. I can't change that. Not anymore. No respect anymore. I understand it. Don't like it. But I understand it. McGee, I've prodded long enough. Grown a backbone that one. Not just a nerd anymore. I can't get past the frat-boy. I like my jokes. I like my movies. They're part of me but they aren't me. Tony DiNozzo. No one remembers the good I've done. They remember the annoying. I need a new team. One I can trust. One that will respect me, regardless of the quotes. One that will split the work, so I can go home at night. Gibbs, you. We've lost it. We don't have what we did. Not really. It's an imitation. I want what we had but I don't know how to get there or even if we can."

Stunned silence.

Tony looked at Abby, who had stepped away during his monologue. Pleaded with his eyes. Begging for someone to understand. Someone to sympathize. She stepped forward and through her arms around him. Silent for once. Kissed his cheek.

"You call me," she whispered intently. "You call me and we go out for drinks. I won't lose you."

"Never. Never."

Satisfaction. She got it. Didn't need him but wanted him. He could take it. Could take it.

Palmer stepped in front of McGee. Offered his hand. "Beer on Saturday for the game still?"

Tony smirked. "Your beer, my place."

Semblance of normalcy.

Ducky. Looked at him with wisdom and understanding. Understood. Had for years, now that he thought. Knew he was ready.

Tony looked at Ziva. Still, silent. Staring with dark eyes. Shadowed, hidden. Tilted his head, stared back with serious green. She stepped forward.

"Goodbye," she stepped forward, close. "Doesn't matter what anyone tries to say, no?"

No. Not anymore. Tony shook his head. She nodded.

"Goodbye Tony." A flash of emotion. Anger, relief, resentment, regret?

McGee stood, head tilted down. "Tim."

Raised his head.

"Tony."

"You'll do well."

"I kn…" he stopped himself.

"You'll do well as part of the team."

McGee made eye contact. Brief comprehension between the two. Team effort. Don't screw up. Regret. Apology. Realization. A glimmer of respect. A hand, outstretched. The other took and shook. Two nods. A promise in his eyes. Not gonna disappear, even if he didn't respect him anymore.

Gibbs. Anger in his eyes. Disapproval. Tony shrugged off a wince. Not his boss anymore. Just Gibbs. Not Boss. Just Gibbs. Not Boss. Gibbs took Tony's shoulder. Looked into his eyes.

"You didn't talk to me."

"Didn't know I needed to."

"Still should have."

"Didn't know I had to."

"We're a team, DiNozzo."

"I know."

"Do you?"

"I didn't leave without a goodbye."

"I was sick."

"I didn't say anything."

"We've treated you fairly. You're a good agent."

"We have different definitions and understanding of fair. And that's not always enough."

"You can't leave."

"Not moving out of the country. Just the Pentagon."

"My team, my rules."

"My team, my rules."

"That's it then?"

"That's it."

Steady stare. Gibbs lifted his chin. Gave a small, satisfied smile. A single pat on his cheek.

"Nothing else to say?"

"What do you want me to?"

"Thought you'd say more."

" You know what you're doing. You can't come running back."

"Not gonna need to."

Gibbs nodded and turned around walking back to desk.

Vance cleared his throat. Tony blinked and looked.

"Monday, DiNozzo. Get your self out of here and I'll meet you on Monday at the Pentagon. 0730."

Tony nodded.

His team looked at him. Mixture of disappointment, understanding. He had still been part of team.

New age now. New agents, new people. New rules. His rules. Live by his own expectations. Own style. Own team. Hard. Lots of time to train them. Hard. But good. Satisfying.

Abby, Palmer, and Ducky went down. Tony packed. Tucked his stapler, his mug away. His files. Looked around one last time. He'd be back. But he wouldn't. Tony DiNozzo today wouldn't be the Tony DiNozzo of tomorrow. And that was all right. In fact, that was better than all right. New start, new chance.

Tony DiNozzo, team leader.

No catch.

No big blow up. Perhaps in his movie filled brain he had expected it. But it was fitting. Just leave. Not finale, no climax, no resolution. He headed for the elevator. One last look. Nod at Probie. Glance at Ziva. Gibbs.

Elevator.

"DiNozzo."

Turned around.

Gibbs stood close. "You don't disappear."

"No bo…Gibbs."

"You don't get yourself killed."

"I hope not."

"Not gonna screw up."

"Thank you."

"I wish…"

What?

"Goodbye."

Of course.

"See ya."

Walked into the elevator. Stared into Gibbs's eyes. Doors shut. It was time. It was good. It was right.

"This is the way the world ends. Not with a bang but a whimper." –T.S. Eliot, "The Hollow Men"

_So this has been on the bottom of my screen for forever. Didn't even think I was going to do another piece. But I did. Sorry if this is anti-climactic. I thought it was strangely fitting but that's just me. Love to know what you think. I have to be in the right mood to write. Should I do a short follow up or just leave it be?Honestly. I'm leaning towards letting Tony go. But I want to know. And if I do continue what should it be about? Anyway. Thanks for reading. No idea how much that means to me! Okay, so I had so promised myself not to become the cliché author with the notes at the bottom. So I'm going to stop and just say thanks. Really. _


End file.
